Let's Get the Conversation Flowing

What can be done to support people who menstruate?

Genuine empathy and understanding. I think it's very hard for anyone to relate to the physical and mental experience of others without feeling something akin to it themselves, however.
Leave us alone. Give more tolerance for mood swings and needing to rest.
By having a genuine knowledge and understanding and having it spoken about more rather than such a taboo subject that many men get awkward about involving themselves in.
Be accommodating if someone needs a break or needs to go to the toilet, get medication etc and treat them seriously. Although many people with uteruses experience them, they’re so readily written off because they’re quite common, it can be hard to express how difficult activities can be when you’re experiencing periods. Making them less taboo – having period products that they’re unlikely to need themselves, talking about them with people experiencing them (not cringing and walking away etc).
Free sanitary stuff in bathrooms is a must, but trying to empathise like you know what it feels like is grim.
Stop saying “oh you must be on your period” and stupid things like that, and acknowledge that they’re painful and we can’t function like other days. Just be more understanding and caring.
Put the kettle on, take over childcare for a bit.
Be understanding. Give hugs. Listen and take the time to understand what happens in a cycle.
So many ways. If your partner menstruates, get them the food they crave, go out and buy the products they need, sit them down and put on their favourite show, give them a hug, or space. Take something, or everything, off their to do list. Run a hot bath. The list is endless.
Understand the monthly hormonal cycle.
Not much, maybe surprises of things we like, comfort food etc, and cuddles.
Being understanding about the fact we may not be 100% and it doesn’t make us weak.
Emotional support by not giving people with periods a hard time. Be understanding when they cannot attend certain events due to pain. And help with housework is a nice gesture.
Not make jokes about them, actually experience somehow how painful and debilitating they can be. Also understand cycles – e.g some parts of the cycle we’ll feel confident and powerful, others we feel anxious and low energy. Planning life (interviews, presentations, gatherings, parties, holidays etc) around periods could change the world ;)
Educate themselves about the effects beyond physical. That a menstrual cycle has multiple phases – the period only being one of those phases and how hormones throughout those phases affect everything from energy to mood.
Don't be grossed out by it or make people feel gross for talking about them. One time a male housemate kindly pointed out that I'd left a used sanitary pad rolled up in tissue on the side of the bathroom and forgotten to throw it away. He didn't make me feel at all bad or gross for it, just discreetly mentioned it to me and I got rid of it straight away.
Don’t make jokes like "someone must be on their period". Not freaking out if we talk about it. Seeing it as a valid reason to be off sick.
Just by not acting like they're disgusting or getting embarrassed by them.
Be kinder.
Understanding how much our moods and energy levels can be impacted by our periods and hormone levels in general. Empathy is really key to managing our relationships, romantic and professional.
Give massages!
Understanding, empathy, knowledge.
I think the general attitude to periods should be better, it’s not gross. If I’m in pain or feeling sick, I shouldn’t have to pretend I’m not just because the word ‘period’ freaks you out! It isn’t as crazy as it seems, there is blood and then it is tidied away. There are different ways to deal with it, tampons and pads, just buy me some sometimes if I run out ?
Education is key, don't use it as a tool against women in the workplace or personal life. We can't control our hormones.
Don't talk about it as being gross or dirty or smelly, don't be embarrassed to buy period products for the women in your life when you're buying groceries and toiletries.
Be understanding that our hormones fluctuate and it's often not a choice behaviour.
At the point we’re now, I would be content if they wouldn’t feel and – communicate that – they think it’s disgusting. Be empathetic those days. We’re in pain, damn it, and we have to go on with life like nothing is happening?!
They would win me over if when I am at a party or at the office and I need to ask another woman for a tampon or something, they would pull out one from their pocket and offer it. It would be quite odd, but also nice.
Accept that it is as painful/uncomfortable as we say it is. Take on a bigger share of responsibilities around the house (cooking, tidying) on days when we are feeling unwell because of our period and respect that plans may have to be cancelled/altered. Offer to go out and buy painkillers and tampons/sanitary towels for us if we don't have any.
When we are having our period, just acknowledge we are not at our 100% capacity and there is nothing you can do about it. Buying chocolates and preparing the hot water bag.
If they could understand the pain, problem solved – haha!
For men that don’t/have never experienced periods… Actually ask questions – the more they practise saying the word the less icky it’ll feel. When people recoil at a conversation about periods, I often ask if they would do that to people with other long term health conditions that affect them all year round. The answer is usually no. Also, they often hold the keys to what is/isn’t spoken about in the office (e.g. if I’m talking to colleagues about periods in the communal space and a cis-man walks past, everyone stops talking or laughs it off). Understanding that I’m constantly unwell (it’s not just while you’re bleeding that you can experience menstrual discomfort or symptoms) and there may well be reasonable adjustments that they have the tools to dream up or enforce for us would make a difference.
Not shy away from conversations about them.
Just not being awkward or dismissive if it comes up. Acknowledging them.
More toilets and bins in all public buildings and offices. Thinking ahead about people who might have periods when arranging ‘fun days’ out. Not asking questions if you go to the loo very often some days.
Being sensitive, understanding that they are horrid
By listening. By supporting. By asking for better funding for women’s/those who have periods’ healthcare and research.
Some acknowledgement that we’re great for having this experience every month and just getting on with it like heroes would be nice.
Understand the mood swings, allow WFH/days off on bad days, be respectful and supportive of doctors visits, pay for all the products that go along with it. Work with them to find solutions, be on their side and fight their corner. Also, sex.
Be forgiving when we have them.
Don’t joke about them – usually to me, this feels demeaning. If you wouldn’t joke about a migraine, don’t joke about a period. Understand that energy levels fluctuate and that the pain is real. Usually period pain is the worst pain I’ll feel in a year by a significant margin. If you’re a boss or teacher, be understanding if female employees or students need time off for periods. It really can feel like an illness. If you’re the partner of a person on their period, doing small things like taking over the cooking/food shopping for a few days helps significantly.
Educate themselves, don't be embarrassed to talk about periods, be nice if we're in pain, don't make fun. Don't assume we're in terrible pain the whole time but don't underestimate the pain when we say we're in pain.
Don't be awkward, ask questions and be informed so you don't ask stupid questions like, “do you want a bar of chocolate?” when I say I'm on my period 😤
Providing free period products at workplaces and schools, educating young boys and girls to remove stigma about periods.
Don't make remarks like, “are you getting your period?” when I say something you don't like to hear or when I'm annoyed. I don't always have to be nice and friendly, and it's got nothing to do with my period. And even so...
It seems that my period does make it easier for me to make a point without the “be nice filter” on.
Understanding and knowledge of how it impacts us once a month. Knowledge of actually how painful it is. Not be embarrassed about speaking about it. Be interested and ask questions.
Understand that we have less energy, a long hike is i.e. uncomfortable, we are at a slower pace, we worry about bathroom breaks. And help carry heavy stuff, because it’s more difficult!
Bins with lids in your bathroom. I hate having to hide tampons in my pockets.
Being open to conversation and not being repulsed by blood! I understand some people find blood uncomfortable… but blood is just a fact of life for people who menstruate so it can sometimes make us feel uncomfortable if men express disgust etc.
Men can make periods part of normal conversation. If men normalise periods, more women will openly discuss them. I think if more women discuss, compare and give advice on periods people will understand their own periods better, and understand when something is wrong.
Reference them sometimes, ask questions! Show an interest.
Listen, no judgement, don’t says things like, “oh that’s why you’re acting crazy, it’s your time of the month.”
Reducing stigma!! Not being ‘weird’ or obviously feeling uncomfortable when the word is mentioned. It's just a period. The majority of the women they know will have had a period every single month for years and years.
Understanding when I explain I'm not feeling great because of my PERIOD, educating themselves on what it actually means to have a period and how women can feel, be involved in marketing and advertising campaigns.
The book ‘Period’ by Emma Barnett should be on the school curriculum. Boys should be involved in education about them in school.
Stop gaslighting us about the pain (research has shown period cramps can sometimes be as painful as a heart attack.) I could go on...
Become more aware of the impacts of them and how they impact the woman you love or spend time with.
By not making misogynistic period jokes, by not being grossed out by them, learning more generally about periods, being supportive.
More understanding around periods and why someone may be acting differently, always have painkillers around.
Being understanding. Lots of cuddles and snacks.
Make period products free, introduce period leave and provide painkillers. Add bins to every toilet. Also, treat us like normal, equal people.
Keep period products in their houses in case we start when we're there and get caught short. Also, not be scared to talk about it and ask the person what they can do. Heat up a wheat bag? Throw chocolate at them and run away? Give them a cuddle? Everyone's different! Also in professional contexts, bear in mind what the women they work with could be going through if they seem a little off.
Don't be pr**ks.